Mother and Father...

Hi, I'm your son, don't know if you realized...  I've grown, changed and learned on my own with little to no assistance from either of you.  Mother, you abusive drunk, when you'd throw your bottles at me, or strike me with objects, bladed or blunt I faught it, faught the urge to snap your neck like a twig, Faught the urge to push you through a window and jump-stomp your skull into a disgusting paste all over the street... When you hit me with the car, or crushed my ankle between the wall and your bumper, I refused to turn you in, out of fear, not love.  

Father, you hated me before I was even born, you and mother both are guilty of attempted murder in my eyes.  After birth, where were you?  Where was my father?  The man whom was supposed to teach me to be a man, to protect me from the evils of men, the hero from the stories?  No where...  I suffered nights of sleeplessness, tears streaming wishing I knew who you were, when you were infront of me the entire time, refusing to show yourself...

Mother, you spent your days drinking and smoking infront of a computer screen, quickly becoming a better gamer than myself, I pity you, not envy.  A grown woman leading children down the path of pain, offering them love and companionship only to throw it in their faces whenever they were more than 5 minutes late to log into your game.  You disgust me, dating men younger than I.  Sleeping around, and killing the children whom you are too immature to give birth too... I wish I could do it to you... Cram you in a tube and obliterate you with a giant eggbeater, have you feel the pain, the fear and horror they had...

Unborn siblings, I want to say hi, I'm your younger, and older brother.  The one whom knows of you, sees you and wants to protect you... Even though you're trapped, chained to mother's soul I bare the weight on my heart.  I sit day by day thinking of how things could have been, could I have taught you to ride a bike? Read?  Oh the games we'd have played...

To my Twin, I knew not of you from birth, as you were the protector of me, in the womb wether you knew it or not, you were sacraficed so I might live, you are my hero and for your sacrafice I am forever greatful... Unlike the heroes of our day none of you recived funerals or even aknowledgement, merely processed and forgotten, flushed down a toilet or burned reduced to nothing more than ash... I'm sorry.  I'm so sorry...

To the grandparents whom let the suffering of others continue with turned cheeks and plugged ears.  Why didn't you stop your children from doing things that would cause so much pain?  Was it giving them their independance when you allowed them release from jail, or giving excuses and blaming yourselves for their personalities?  They are the people they were ment to be, suffering and lonely.  I pity them, as do my living siblings, to this day only my older brother and I are aware of the siblings that were ment to be.  I'll not force my younger siblings to suffer the knowledge of their mother's sins... Now you lay in bed, as the cancer eats you from the inside out, suffering so much pain that you can't stand it.  You were once so strong, now you're getting the reward you've earned for your weakness... Suffer as we've suffered, when you could have saved us, you let us
rot...

My heart, Once pure and innocent, growing, learning, loving.  It was shattered to pieces, as were other's and I apologize to them, for I've become what I dispise... My heart did heal, oh it healed so much... Alas it healed crooked, twisted, small and bitter.  I dreamed of becoming a hero one day, but know I'll never be, stuck, trapped as a villain and a victom to the horrors of my past.

Anger, I fed you, used you, allowed you to use me, we battled many, won all, and ruined the lives of some... People whom were innocent, merely in the way of our progress... they were innocent, and were not our enemies... Yet we viewed them as such, so we treated them as such.  Some have claimed to have forgiven us, but I understand not the reasons for that.  I still hate much, but I'm learning to control you.

My friends and loves, I apologize... I am a liar, a thief, and an abuser... Mentally if not physically, I lie to you all and do unspeakable things to you all.  Yet you know this, and love me anyway, you treat me better than anyone ever should, you know me and treat me as a great person, you make me feel like the hero I want to be, and for that I can never thank you enough.